If transparency about what a person did “ruins their reputation” then their reputation was always a lie, built on the hope no one would look too closely at the skeletons in their closet
Of course it’s nice to FEEL like a safe person on top of BEING one, but truly being one requires ACTUALLY sitting with the discomfort that you were hurtful. And it almost goes without saying: beware anyone who has to paint people as the villain in order to avoid accountability for the hurt they caused
stitch with @Jonathan Buchanan yeah as a hiker who has literally had that exact scenario happen… yup picking the bear. New Hampshire is bear central, not like this dude would listen though
Replying to @user6398951332 Ironically, the goal of their bad faith response is to ensure you never communicate any other “inconvenient” feelings ever again. And, in a way they’re right: when I revoke their access to me, that also means I’ll never tell them anything, ever again, which includes those emotions
Replying to @satinwatermelon That’s operating under the assumption that their dubious motives trip them up somehow, instead of fueling them forward in ways honesty and genuineness never could
See also: the “enlightened” manpulator, who is just so sophisticated that it pains them to explain to someone on your level (but try they will, anyway!)
In some ways I should thank my former friend — needing to process what she put me through is probably what helped get me back to making vids after losing Salem
I literally wear a ring on my left hand so dudes will think I’m engaged and leave me alone — what part of this makes anyone believe I wouldn’t want exactly the same outcome without having deliberately placed jewelry?
Replying to @schmellyeyelashes And as an epilogue, that person is still my friend to this day, and isn’t afraid to point out when I start masking in order to blend in
stitch with @cam like camera 📸 There are other elements that I hooe to eventually touch upon, because they are so similar to my own, but those were a bit retraumatizing and I’m not in the headspace to discuss those yet
And in some ways it serves as a great analogy: the adjustment to day-to-day life will be full of unpleasant “onboarding” symptoms, but it will be worth it ❤️ #salem #adhd #update
This’ll probably be the last time I talk about the specifics of the friend breakup for a while. Not a fan of the surge of adrenaline (and then shaky hand) it gives me.