The Considerate Momma

#stitch with @Coffee with Jenni & Dre #howtostopyelling #parenting #parentsoftiktok

Cooperation THROUGH connection #respectfulparenting #gentleparenting #consciousparenting #parentcoach #parenting #parentsoftiktok

#parenting #parentsoftiktok

#stitch with @Madi • SAHM Which shows more strength? 💁🏼‍♀️ #gentleparenting #respectfulparenting #consciousparenting

This mother IS a Cycle Breaker and we can learn a few things from this: 1. Timeout (forced isolation), trying to logic/rationalize with a toddler in the midst of a tantrum & forcing apologies is NOT Authoritative (Gentle/Conscious/Respectful) Parenting and here’s why: Authoritative Parenting needs to have EQUAL measures of warmth/responsiveness AND accountability expectation. If there is an imbalance, it becomes either permissive or authoritarian. 2. In this example, warmth/responsiveness is lessened by the physical disconnection of the timeout & the emotional disconnection of both the logical/rational conversation and the timeout. The measure of accountability/expectation is also raised beyond what this child is capable of doing at such a young age. 3. On the surface, it looks like the timeout helped the little girl calm down but she is actually experiencing the Dorsal Vagal state or PEAK of dysregulation in her nervous system which is evidenced by emotional distance, shut down & numbness. The behavior absolutely needs to be disciplined AND effective discipline that corrects the behavior longterm can be done without the methods used here. I would recommend: 1. Validating the emotion while maintaining the boundary around behavior. 2. Empathizing with the child’s frustration 3. Modeling replacement behaviors such as deep breaths, dragon breaths, squeezing a pillow or jumping jacks to process frustration OUT of the body For more resources to discipline without disconnection, head to my page & check out the available resources there. #parenting #parentsoftiktok #consciousparenting #respectfulparenting #gentleparenting #connectedparenting #peacefulparenting #breakingthecycle

Ditch time-outs and learn to discipline WITHOUT disconnection! ❤️ Head over to my page to learn more 👉🏼 #parenting #parentsoftiktok #consciousparenting #connectedparenting #respectfulparenting

ILYSM — sincerely! #parenting #parentsoftiktok #peacefulparenting #connectedparenting #consciousparenting #gentleparenting

Is this your “I’M DONE” moment? I know exactly how to get you on the other side of this! Head to my page to learn how. #parentsoftiktok #parenting #consciousparenting #respectfulparenting #connectedparenting #parentinghacks #breakingthecycle #peacefulparenting

You cannot “self-control” your way out of rage-filled parenting. 👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼 Rage isn’t an issue of self-control. It’s an issue of “faulty wiring” in your brain that stem from your childhood. Your child misbehaves and your brain pulls from the neurological “files” that were created when you witnessed how your parents responded to the same or similar behaviors. - If your parents yelled, your default will be to yell. - If your parents disconnected emotionally or physically, your default will be to disconnect emotionally or physically. - If your parents blamed, shamed or ridiculed, your default will be to blame, shame or ridicule. Your default patterns are your IMPULSES… And impulses aren’t controlled by WILLPOWER; they’re controlled by shifting the wiring of your brain’s default patterns. In my upcoming 💲7️⃣ online ma$tercla$s, “The 3 Secrets to Discipline Without Rage”, I’ll show you the exact steps to do this: You’ll walk away from this cla$s knowing: 1. The *REAL* Root of where ALL misbehavior stems from (and, no, it’s not what most parents think) 2. The real reason why the many discipline strategies you’ve tried (including many popular “Gentle Parenting” techniques) only temporarily stop misbehavior instead of actually correcting behavior longterm 3. My signature, evidence-based discipline formula that DOES WORK to correct behavior and create more peace at home 🔆It’s all happening March 21st at 11AM CST. If you can’t attend l!ve, a rec0rding will be sent to all regi$trant$, so don’t hesitate to still s!gn up! ➡️➡️ HEAD TO MY PAGE FOR THE 🔗 (in my b!0) #parenting #parentsoftiktok #consciousparenting #respectfulparenting #connectedparenting #peacefulparenting #gentleparenting #parentingtips #breakingthecycle #parentinghacks #parentinghelp

Replying to @ktaylor348 ahhhh the old “autonomy leap” #respectfulparenting #gentleparenting #consciousparenting #parentcoach #parenting #parentsoftiktok

#duet with @Jared James #parents #respectfulparenting #parentsoftiktok #MomsofTikTok #dadsoftiktok

It **IS** that deep…AND I can help ❤️#parenting #parentsoftiktok #consciousparenting #parentcoach #parentingcoach

Make it make sense! #sharing #adulthood

Replying to @20reedas These moments may be far more rare now…but they certainly still happen for me too. With many emotions and behaviors, I can now go the long haul and stay connected & compassionate to the end…but there are still some deeply wounded areas in my inner child where she feels the need to FIGHT FOR HER LIFE! 😩 If you’re working on STRETCHINGGGG your “window of tolerance” too and you want to know what got me from the 10 second to 15+ minute window, I’ve put my exact roadmap into a 💲7️⃣ m@st3rc|ass called “Rage Reset” (there’s a L|NK in my B|0). Bottom line: I GET YOU! I’m still healing, learning, and growing too. ❤️❤️❤️ #parenting #parentsoftiktok #respectfulparenting #gentleparenting #peacefulparenting #connectedparenting #consciousparenting

THIS 👇🏼 WILL BOGGLE YOUR BRAIN 👇🏼🫨 Yelling, threatening, bribing and punishing children **DO WORK** to modify a child’s behavior, but NOT because the child is learning any logical or rational lessons. A child gets quiet when yelled at because yelling sends their nervous system into the FLIGHT, FIGHT OR FREEZE response. A child becomes compliant when threatened because the threat sends their nervous system into the FLIGHT, FIGHT OR FREEZE response. A child will “do the right thing” when punished, NOT because their logical brain has learned WHY a better decision was needed, but because the punishment sent their nervous system into a FLIGHT, FIGHT OR FREEZE response. The “lessons” children learn when we consistently use yelling, threatening, bribery or punishment as discipline are creating the multitude of mental & emotional handicaps many grown adults have today. If you want your child to learn the logical lessons you’re trying to teach… If you want them to build emotional intelligence and be able to self-regulate… And if you want them to be INTERNALLY motivated by a strong moral compass to do the right thing… You need to understand: 1. The *REAL* Root of where ALL misbehavior stems from (and, no, it’s not what most parents think) 2. The real reason why the many discipline strategies you’ve tried (including many popular “Gentle Parenting” techniques) only temporarily stop misbehavior instead of actually correcting behavior longterm 3. My evidence-based discipline formula that DOES WORK to teach root lessons, build emotional intelligence & instill a strong moral compass in your children It’s all included in my upcoming 💲7️⃣ online C L A S S, “The 3 Secrets to Discipline Without Rage” happening on March 21st at 11AM, CST. ➡️➡️If you can’t attend live, don’t worry. A recording will be sent to all who register so don’t hesitate to sign up. 🔗HEAD OVER TO MY PAGE TO LEARN MORE🔗 #consciousparenting #calmparenting #connectedparenting #respectfulparenting #regulatedparenting #disciplinewithoutdisconnection #ragefreeparenting #parenting #parentsoftiktok #gentleparenting

Replying to @Rosemary. If a child doesn’t get ⭐️THIS⭐️, they cannot learn the lessons we want them to! #parentsoftiktok #respectfulparenting #gentleparenting #consciousparenting #parenting #connectedparenting

There is a difference between PUNISHMENT and DISCIPLINE! Let’s explore… ⬇️⬇️⬇️
 Discipline is the loving guidance we offer our children to help them learn, grow, and understand the consequences of their actions. It's about fostering self-awareness, empathy, and responsibility. Discipline empowers both parent and child to collaboratively navigate challenges, fostering a relationship built on trust and mutual respect. On the other hand, punishment often comes from a place of control or fear, aiming to suppress behavior rather than address its underlying causes. It can create feelings of shame, resentment, and disconnection, ultimately hindering the development of genuine understanding and accountability. Just as we teach ABCs and 123s, it's equally crucial to equip our children with the skills to navigate their feelings and behaviors without shame or disconnection. When we provide children the building blocks of EMOTIONAL intelligence we inadvertently: 1. Equip them to feel, process through AND express every emotion healthily (including anger, sadness, disappointment or frustration) 2. Build empathetic children who are genuinely invested in the well-being of those around them 3. Raise resilient children who do not feel the need to shrink or silence their own thoughts, feelings or opinions to please or appease others 4. Teach them that their voice matters and can be used for greatness 5. Model healthy authority so when our children come face-to-face with toxic authority, they know how to stand up for themselves My Kids Calm Down Kit is NOW AVAILABLE in a print-on-demand POSTER (comes to you fully printed and ready to hang!!!!)! This poster provides a safe space for kids ages 3-8 years to explore, understand, and learn to manage their emotions and behaviors. From soothing sensory exercises to empowering activities, each element is carefully curated to foster emotional intelligence and produce healthier behavior. ➡️ Head to the ⭐️ L 1 N K ⭐️ on my page to get yours! #parenting #parentsoftiktok #consciousparenting #gentleparenting #respectfulparenting #calmparenting #parentingtips #parentingtips

How many of the 5 do you find yourself doing? #parenting #parentsoftiktok #consciousparenting #respectfulparenting #connectedparenting #peacefulparenting #breakingthecycle #parentinghelp #discipline

#duet with @Alpha Motivation #parenting #parentsoftiktok #cyclebreaker #breakthecycle #cyclebreakers

You hate how you feel after you rage at your kids… …and you can physically feel the disconnect it causes. “I HATE being this person,” you think to yourself. “What is wrong with me that I can’t get my kids to listen to me without getting so angry” you ask? Friend, I sincerely wish I could jump through this screen, hug you tight and whisper “you’re not alone…AND I know **exactly** how to help!” I was once this parent too. I was repeating patterns I saw modeled in childhood and I was desperate to find the tools to discipline my kids without disconnecting from them. ➡️ If you’re ready for a discipline plan that CORRECTS behavior WITHOUT disconnection head to the 🔗 on my page! I went on an almost 4 year journey and discovered 3 key things along the way: 1. The *REAL* Root of where ALL misbehavior stems from (and, no, it’s not what most parents think) 2. The real reason why so many discipline strategies (including many popular “Gentle Parenting” techniques) only temporarily stop misbehavior instead of actually correcting behavior longterm 3. A signature, evidence-based discipline formula that DOES WORK to correct behavior and create more peace in the home I’ve taken the key knowledge I’ve gained over the last four years and turned it into a 💲7️⃣ transformational workshop called “The Three Secrets to Discipline Without Rage” happening March 21st at 11AM CST. A recording will be sent out to all who sign up. #parentsoftiktok #parenting #consciousparenting #respectfulparenting #connectedparenting #parentinghacks